Too Many Curveballs.
I imagine you can see that I haven’t posted on here in a while. Unfortunately things have been intensely chaotic. Life decided to throw me several curve balls at once, and I’m just finally getting to a point where I’m juggling them all smoothly again.
I’ll write about them individually, but the short version is much easier to digest.
Last I wrote I had been talking about the idea of starting a second career and was contemplating how to transition my business to be able to handle me having less hands-on time for it. That was the end of January.
In early March we started looking for and found an awesome dog for my daughter – and it was a miracle worker. That dog has truly changed her life in a good way, at least in terms of how she relates to animals.
Later in March, my daughters father got in touch with my via Facebook after 9 years.
He makes it clear that he wants to try to be a dad (give the man a cookie eh?) and starts talking to me about all that. Of course, I’m not horribly thrilled by that prospect since he’s never proven himself to be worth much oxygen in the first place – but I decide to at least give him a trial-run with me on the phone and email to get to find out if he’s any more useful than in the past.
Unsurprisingly, and despite my warnings to him that I knew he would do this, he starts flirting with me in what I perceive to be an attempt to get to my daughter through sweet-talking me. Over my objections that I’m not interested in that at all, he continues on even to the extent of talking about wanting to marry me. Sure, I’d probably sleep with him mostly because I’ve been living a nunnish life lately, but not out of any attraction (trust me, there’s none) and simply out of convenience because we’ve lived together & had a child together.
To my great amusement and little surprise, his interest wanes after a couple of months and he rings up an old girlfriend who is so mentally unstable she will think the sun rises and sets with him. Again, not a surprise. To my knowledge I’m the only girlfriend he ever had who didn’t have mental issues, and that’s about as textbook a self-esteem issue as they come in why he picks disposable women like that. Anyway, of course, he doesn’t realize he does that. He also doesn’t seem to realize he fixates for short periods.
I had finally agreed to let him meet his daughter after talking to him for a couple of months, and he was fixating on her for a bit, then, of course, that started to wane also. Now he’s fixating on his new bipolar pill-popping juice-head girlfriend who just up and moved across the country to live near him (after only being back in touch with him for a couple of months). Pathetic. Anyway, he’s talking as if he thinks in a million years this is someone I would ever allow into my girls life. Get real.
In the end of it, it’s all good I suppose, he’s getting my daughter so irritated with him that I may not have to do or say anything in the long run. He can’t even spend a few hours with her and keep his mind on her without pulling out his iPhone to check to see if he’s got messages from his girlfriend — and that, my daughter sees and is reacting to. She knows he’s not focused on her, and he’ll probably end up losing her because of it.
So meanwhile, my great-grandmothers care facility for Alzheimers patients has upped the monthly care costs a few times, and I’m having to carry as much of that as I can. I never realized the amount involved in that kind of care. Seriously, it’s just ridiculous.
In addition, my grandmother is starting to have memory loss issues that are concerning me. We’re possibly going to have to go to court to gain legal control of financial and medical decisions over my great-grandmother. Meanwhile, I still need to get around do doing my own legal paperwork on my divorce, and I still haven’t figured out what career I’m switching to eventually because I keep getting sidetracked.
In the meantime, and while I figure that out, my kids are doing great in their homeschooling (at least one plus!) and my son is doing absolutely awesome with his speech comparatively. I’ll be starting on a new project building a piece of software soon, and will definitely need decompression breaks… so hopefully I can make myself write a bit more often.
